Exactly 2 years from the day I am writing this, I stepped foot onto the Be in Health campus in Thomaston, GA. A decision made just 48 hours before, led my husband and I here. I was three years into a now stage 4 breast cancer diagnosis. After exhausting every attempt to chase my physical healing, I knew addressing my spiritual healing could no longer be avoided. I was a strong believer, but the truth was the unrelenting battle had taken a massive toll on my spirit. I knew the truth of God’s word for healing; that He was both willing and able. But as time, travel and failed treatment after failed treatment went by, I began to doubt His willingness towards me. I went through a 12-month season I now refer to as the ‘darkest night of the soul’. Wrought with sleepless nights and the taunting, tormenting lies of the evil one, everything in me began to deteriorate.
When I made that decision to come to Be in Health, I knew it couldn’t wait. Even though the session started in less than 36 hours and registration was closed, I prayed and believed God would make a way. I started packing my bag and arranging care for our kiddos, in faith. I’m forever thankful that God did make a way. When we arrived in Georgia, I knew my health wasn’t good, but I had no idea just how grave my condition actually was.
My week at Be in Health was so much more than I could have ever imagined it would be. We were met with such love and kindness. We felt safely cocooned throughout our entire experience. A place free of judgment and full of grace. Over the course of that week, I learned some truth that would very soon, quite literally, save my life. I learned about the Father’s Love. I mean I knew… but something deep inside wouldn’t let me believe it for me. I also learned about the Unloving Spirit and that fear wasn’t ‘just’ a negative emotion, but a spirit.
The weight of my unconfessed sin and the lies of the enemy had me separated and isolated. From God, my husband, my kiddos and myself. I came to Be In Health, riddled by fear, rejection, abandonment, an agonizing sense of unworthiness and suffocating thoughts of impending death. My entire life I hadn’t been able to give or receive love fully. But all of that changed in just 5 days. How can it be? I weep at the remembering. How I came in and how I left. No longer a slave but unshackled. No longer rejected but fully accepted. No longer the lonely and unloved but my Abba Daddy’s beloved daughter in Christ. Worthy of her healing and so much more.
Fast forward three weeks, and I find myself critical, in the ICU with 2.5 liters of malignant fluid on my heart and lungs. Body failing but spirit rising. As my oncologist came in to share the results of the morning’s scans, tears filled her eyes. “It’s not good,” she said. “Sarah, it’s spread. It’s innumerable. Chest, neck, abdomen, bones…brain. I’m sorry”. Me, without missing a beat or shedding a tear, “Thanks Doc. I understand that you have to read me that report, but that’s not the report I’m going to stand on. I stand on the Lord’s report and He said “I will not die but live and declare the works of the Lord. He said “With long life, He will satisfy me and show me His salvation.” In my next breath, I folded that report and stuck it in my Bible and proceeded to reassure my doctor and husband. To this day, I still haven’t read it.
The months ahead were the most grueling of my journey. Yet somehow the most peaceful. Whole brain radiation and chemo, two things I once dreadfully feared were now as nothing in the hands of my loving Father whom I now trusted to be ‘bigger than the bad’. During that four-month season, aside from my immediate family, I pushed everything else in my world aside. I knew there was only one who could bring my miracle. I took the Word like my medicine. I dug into everything I brought home from Be in Health and began to focus on the power of prayer and confessing the promise of my healing found in scripture. Though my flesh was at its weakest, my spirit roared within. Four months later, scans showed a miracle indeed! Nothing in my brain, nothing in my bones, nothing in my abdomen, and little left in my chest.
Today though I am still in the physical battle against cancer, I am fully persuaded that by Jesus’ stripes I am healed. I don’t see it with my earthly eyes (yet) but I know it is so. His love for me, unfailing. His purposes for me, unfinished. His joy and favor over me, unending. I’ve not once since, returned to fear or questioned His promises to me and over me. As for the people in my life…I returned home and immediately loved (and received love) in a capacity I’d always wanted to but never could. Today, I see the fruit of that seed with my mother, my husband and my girls.
We’ve seen more miracles too. Every time, the doctors shake their heads and say ‘How?’. My precious oncologist just answers “Because it’s Sarah Wilson!” But she and I both know the truth. It’s GOD inside Sarah Wilson, who is still today who He said he was and able to do what He said he would do. This ministry did more than change my life, it saved my life. Quite literally, I don’t know that I’d be here had ‘this’ week not happened before ‘that’ week. I’ll never stop pointing people to this place of truth and healing. For He sent His Word, and healed them. Ultimately and only Lord, my story is for Your glory.
Sarah W.
